Achieving M.I.L.F. Status is not all it’s Cracked up to be.
If you’ve ever heard this acronym used in reference to you from one of your children’s friends, be afraid. Be very afraid! Yes folks, thanks to the ever so impressionable film American Pie some years back, the term spread like wildfire throughout the schools of America. (If you don’t know the meaning please google it.)
I remember the first time I had the displeasure of being labeled this term while picking up my son from his freshman football practice. It’s not like they even tried to whisper it as my son got in the SUV. “Hey Nick, your mom’s a M.I.L.F.” My head turned so fast I got whiplash. My jaw dropped to the floor board and I looked at my son in horror. “I can’t believe they just said that.” “They always tease me about it.” he replied back.
“Can’t you just tell them not to say it? I’m your mother for god’s sake!” “Yeah I did, but they’re a bunch of horny teenagers. Can’t you just come pick me up looking a little less made up?”
Was he actually insinuating I was somehow at fault for dressing the way I did or by wearing make up? I thought long and hard about it and had such a complex with every subsequent curb side pick up. So I tried his suggestion. I went there one day in my sweats, disheveled hair, and unpainted canvas.
It was too late. I had been permanently labeled with the scarlet letters. I may have just as well worn a tight fitting midriff T-shirt with the acronym splashed across my bosom.
For the next 4 years I had to endure comments at my son’s expense and shame. But alas, graduation day came and I gladly stepped down from my reign. Only too happy to hand the title over to the next poor unsuspecting attractive Football Booster Mother.
When I see young girls walking around with T-shirts displaying “M.I.L.F in training” I can’t believe their parents would even let them out of the house….which brings me to the thought of how the t-shirt ever get there in the first place?
What is our younger generation coming to? I never thought I would hear myself utter those words…..god I’m getting old!
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